Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Thrown weapons

"Tell the tree story Sarge!"

"Ahh, you've all heard it."

"Pup hasn't, and he wants too!"

"Fair enough. For you then, Pup. As you may or may not have guessed, we get a lot of people who try to appear more expert that they are."

"Wankers!"

"Yeah, true enough.  But a gentleman holds his tongue unless he can offer proof or a well constructed argument otherwise. Here is a tale of where I spoke up, and the tosser in question was proven wrong beyond a shadow of a doubt.

It was at festival, and Tosser, whose name is lost to the mists of time, says that an SCA sword is un - throwable. The physics are off, the balance is shot, and it could never be thrown accurately. I piped up, and said although it was hard to throw, nothing is impossible. I told Tosser that HE might not be able to throw one, but they certainly could be thrown. Tosser started rabbiting (no offense, Rabbit, I just meant he was talking a lot) on about Physics, and I just said 'Shut up' and grabbed a sword.

A standard SCA sword at the time, and as now is a metre long stick with a basket hilt on the back. There is a bucket of weight in the hilt, for they were mainly metal back then"

"Not plastic Sarge?"

"Nah, they only came in after I was made a Baron."

"Why do we call you Sarge, instead of Baron?"

"Coz there are a dozen ways you can become a Baron, but only one way to earn Sarge. Anyway, the hilts were metal, so most of the weight was in the back half. I grabbed the sword, and hefted it, and found it's centre line. I grabbed it two handed, took it behind my back, drew it fast and close over my head, and flipped it end over end at a nearby tree.

Now, I was happy enough that it flew straight at the tree. Even I was gobsmacked by where it landed. The basket hilt has two tangs, metal prongs by which you attach the hilt to the rattan stick. Well, the sword had flown so hard and true that the rear tang stuck into the tree, and made that very movie like 'twang - a twang a twaaangggg.' The sword was sticking out at ninety degrees.I walked over to the tree, had to really really pull, and took away a matchbox worth of tree as well.

Tosser opened his mouth, thought better of it, and just walked away.

Remember, just because YOU can't do something, it doesn't mean it can't be done."

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